009

what makes me saddest is how easy it is for him to walk away from me and not look back.

:(

008 rules

1) no talking to boys
2) no hanging out with boys
3) no calling him before school
4) no asking him to come online
5) no commenting on any activity he does
6) no commenting about any of his friends

007 roller coaster

do you know that feeling as you climb the steep incline of a roller coaster where your breath gets shorter and your heart beats faster? and you reach the tip and look down in fear and anxiety, and pray things go well? and then you drop and your stomach flips around as solid ground is snatched from beneath your feet?

he chose her.

006

you know what, you fucking bitch? stay the fuck away from my fucking boyfriend. don't fucking tell him what i fucking think. don't fucking tell him that it's the fucking season to fucking break up with people. just because you can't fucking keep a man, doesn't mean everyone is as fucked up as you are.

look at the way you fucking talk to other people's fucking boyfriends. and you wonder why your fucking boyfriend and you are having fucking problems? goddamn slut.

but lucky bitch. my fucking boyfriend would rather keep your fucking friendship or whatever the fuck it is. i fucking hate you.

005

i said i didn't care.

i lied.

004 creatures of habit

oh, how we are cursed, wretched, disgusting little creatures of habit.

i have been here, long before.

i lie in the same position, under the same covers, and cry the same silent tears. i read the same things and listen to the same music that makes me want to crawl to a corner and stop breathing, if only.

and once again i find myself falling.
falling.
falling.
falling.

003 just a thought

do you know what it feels like to reach a point where most things stop making sense and the rest don't matter anyway?

i'm there, and i want to leave more than anything. i've reached the point where i'm looking for depressing things to feed my depression.

i need to go home.

i need him.